Many people in our workshops tell us that they don’t always feel comfortable when going to business events.
The main reason seems to be more about them than about the other participants.
These are some of the things they say to themselves:
– I’m probably not interesting enough.
– I’m not an expert so I don’t know enough to meaningfully contribute to a conversation.
– I don’t know any other people so other people will think I don’t belong here.
– I just graduated from college/university and don’t have enough experience yet so people won’t find me interesting to talk to.
– I’m not worthy of getting attention from other people.
– I’m an introvert so I lack social skills.
These are all judgments you have about yourself. 95% of the people you will meet, don’t think this way. The other 5% are probably not worth your time (and please don’t let them discourage you!)
The problem is that when you have these thoughts, the expectations you will have from attending an event will probably be low as well.
What the human mind does, is looking for confirmation of its thoughts.
So if your expectation is that nobody wants to talk to you (for whatever reason you have made up), you will look for the confirmation that they are not interested in you.
When someone looks briefly at you and then looks away, you might think they are not interested. The fact that they turn away makes you think they don’t want to talk to you.
However someone who expects that other people want to talk to him, will interpret this brief look as a sign of interest. He will notice the brief contact moment.
In other words: the way you expect things to happen will influence the results in a big way.
What do you expect when you go to events? That people will talk to you or not?
To your success !